Part II

Remember how last time I bought water at Dollar General, the strange lady who checked me out said she had to scan all eleven jugs, but was very secretive about why, then gave me a reason that made no sense? Well, the next time I bought water, I was checked out by one of the managers who scanned only one jug repeatedly. I told her about the other clerk, and she seemed to think that was as crazy as I had.

Tonight, I went in for my eleven jugs, and I saw, with some disappointment, that O.C. (Obsessive Clerk) was on duty. I made my way back to the water and happened to pass the manager I had once spoken to. "Hey!" she said. "We have it!" She was referring to the water, which she knew I'd come for.

"OK," I said, then I added, "That clerk that scanned all eleven is here."

"Oh, OK." she said.

When I approached the counter with the water, I asked, "Do you need to scan all eleven jugs?"

"Yes," the clerk replied with an earnestness that implied the critical nature of these transactions.

I hoped the manager would pop out at that moment with an "A-HA! I caught you inconveniencing this lady and it will stop TODAY!" but she didn't.

So I took the initiative. "Is that one of the managers?" I pointed back toward the manager.

"It's the assistant manger," O.C. replied.

"Well, she scanned only one jug eleven times---" I was cut off by the sudden apperance of said manager. Better late than never. She quickly marched to the counter and, speaking in a loud and deliberate manner, informed O.C. that if she used the handheld scanner and scanned one jug eleven times, it would be the same as scanning each one individually. She repeated this concept -- of it being the same as scanning each one individually-- several times, perhaps even eleven, as if it took one explanation for every jug to satisfy O.C. She even talked her through the first couple scans, and it was after that that O.C. quit trying to protest. The manager then gave other examples of things that O.C. would not want to scan individually, such as 10 giant bags of dogfood. O.C. finally retreated into silence.

I had a difficult time looking O.C. in the eye as I paid. I felt that I had truly thrown off her day by not allowing her to scan all eleven water jugs. But I also couldn't help feeling triumphant as I wheeled the cart past the register and out the door. There are so few things we can control in life, particularly at Dollar General where I have been subjected to many things, including the marital strife of a redneck couple, a snake in the grocery aisle, and once a trapped and confused moth that I couldn't reach. I can't even get my own students to stop talking or my dogs to quit jumping on my face when I'm in bed. So, yeah, this was definitely a victory in my day.