Part IV

This story comes from my friend Denise. She told it to me so I could add it to my Dollar Store series:

Recently, a Dollar General opened up in Harker Heights -- because, as Denise said, they have to keep up with Kempner. (Only locals will know why that's funny.) She was in a hurry and only needed a 2 liter of Diet Sprite. This particular day was the Grand Opening. Denise got there to find a radio station broadcasting live in the parking lot, with people standing around watching them and taking up parking spaces. Denise hurried in for her two-liter and there met with something she hadn't expected. "Do you know they sell clothes there?" she asked. Now, if you don't know Denise, it should suffice to just tell you that she is the closest thing to a real-life Elle Woods ("Legally Blonde"), intelligence included, I might add. In fact, she has named her daughter Elle. Enough said.

So I told her, yes, I knew they sold clothes there and she went on to exclaim that not only did they sell clothes there, but a lady was buying them. Her main issue with this was that the D.S. clothes were extremely uncute, while Walmart at least attempted to mimic current fashions at prices just as low. Furthermore, this lady was buying piles of them and Denise had to wait for 12 minutes (yes, it appears she timed it) with her 2 liter of Diet Sprite while this lady replenished her wardrobe.

At this point, I was amused, but it really didn't constitute a "Dollar Store" story in the tradition of my series -- until Denise added, "And she was wearing a shower cap!"

She dropped that little gem almost as if it were an after-thought. I took me a second to process and I had to seek clarification: "She...was wearing a shower cap?"

"Yes!" I had heard correctly.

This lady made my Longhorn pajama lady look almost presidential.